From slow tooth extractions to tales of strange requests from patients, you’ve probably heard your share of funny dental stories. We like to laugh, too. So we thought we’d pull together some of our favorites from across the web. Here are our top funny dentistry stories.
Our favorite dental stories:
Animal Dentistry
It’s not just humans who need their mouths cared for by a dentist. Imagine sticking your hands inside a lion, tiger, cheetah, bear, gorilla, or even a crocodile to give a tooth cleaning! Not for the faint of heart – even with anesthesia!
Pulling Those Loose Teeth
Every child gets excited at the loss of a tooth and a visit from the tooth fairy! Some kids have gone to extremes to get those teeth to come out.
Some examples involve dental floss tied around the tooth and then tied to…
- a dad pulling it out,
- a door slamming shut with the tooth behind it,
- How about a car?! One little guy tied his string to his dad’s bumper and dad pulled away, pulling out the tooth away, too!
- Another young lady made use of her German Shepherd to take the other end of the string and chase his ball. Of course, the tooth popped out when the dog took off.
Tooth Fairy
Waiting for the tooth fairy is another experience. There are even apps now that can let you film or take a photo of your child sleeping, and the app will add the tooth fairy to the video or to the photo for your child to wake up and see in the morning!
French tips
“I once had a patient come in complaining about a lost veneer. It turns out she had bought a box of plastic stick-on French manicure nails and superglued the tips to her teeth. She had been re-sticking them for years, but she finally got tired of it and wanted me to use some of my “dental glue” to get them to stay on more permanently. When I refused and instead tried to get her to let me clean off the layers and layers of crusty glue and food and plaque, she was angry and stormed out screaming about how I was only in this for the money and how dare I not help out a poor mother. The thing is, from a distance, they didn’t actually look all that bad. Up close, a rotting disaster, but from afar I was actually pretty impressed with her ingenuity.” – Catty Mayonnaise, Reddit.com
E.T phoned home
“I had a patient that came in and we went through the entire appointment like normal. Then, at the end of the appointment, he dramatically handed me a magazine that had aliens on the cover. He warned that we were going to be taken over one day and that I should prepare myself.” -Courtesy DentalProductsReport.com
Motor mouth
“I had a biker come in wanting a full upper with sharpened metal teeth so he could bite people. In order to scare him off, I had I didn’t want to be responsible for someone being badly hurt or killed.”- Greg Appleby
Something borrowed
“I had a guy bring in his late mother’s dentures to see if I could make them fit his mouth.” – Bryan Tuttle
All I Want for Christmas…
Who doesn’t love a “punny” story? This one from guy-sports.com has one we think is great, with a holiday twist!
A man visits his dentist because his mouth feels strange. His dentist examines him and says, “That new upper plate I put in for you six months ago is eroding. What have you been eating?”
The patient answers with a frown, “All I can think of is that about four months ago my wife made some asparagus and put some stuff on it that was delicious – Hollandaise sauce, I think it was. I loved it so much I now put it on everything: meat, toast, fish, vegetables, everything.”
“Well,” the dentist says, “that’s probably the problem. Hollandaise sauce is made with lots of lemon juice, which is highly corrosive. It’s eaten away your upper plate. I’ll make you a new plate, and this time use chrome.”
The patient asks, “Why chrome?”
The dentist replies, “It’s simple. Everyone knows that there’s no plate like chrome for the Hollandaise.”
Righty-Tighty, Lefty-Loosey
This gem of a story was pulled from notalwaysright.com. To set up the scene, imagine a doctor calling into a surgical product hotline while his patient is sitting there, mouth agape, and potentially under anesthesia…but, maybe not. This story is told from the hotline agent’s perspective.
Doctor: “The screw is not going in. Which way do I turn it?”
Hotline Agent: “Clockwise.”
Doctor: “Clockwise from above or below?”
Hotline Agent: “If you are looking at the head of the screw, then clockwise…to the right.”
Doctor: “What do you mean to the right? Move the wrench to the right?”
Hotline Agent: “As the screw turns, and you are looking at the head, the top part will go to the right.”
Doctor: “Okay, I think I got it.”
Hotline Agent: “Good. Righty tighty, lefty loosey.”
Doctor: “What was that?”
Hotline Agent: “Uh, righty tighty, lefty loosey? That’s one way to remember. You go to the right to tighten, and the left to loosen.”
Doctor: “Oh, I see. Righty tighty, lefty loosey!” (Agent hears the noise of wrench turning) “Righty tighty, lefty loosey. It’s working!”
Hotline Agent: “Great. All finished?”
(The doctor speaks up much louder than before and is clearly not talking to the agent.)
Doctor: “You’re all done then!”
Patient: (Agent hears in the distance) “Uh, thank you doctor.”
Rogue tooth
“My brother’s dentist said this was the weirdest thing ever. My brother had been having serious jaw pain for weeks and he said his back teeth really hurt. He thought he was getting in his wisdom teeth because he had never noticed this particular tooth before, and the gums around it were really inflamed. Made sense to him – the tooth was just breaking through the skin. Then it got infected. His gums swelled up and he said his mouth always tasted like chicken soup. He went to his dentist (like a month or more after the pain started) and the dentist was shocked. Because it wasn’t a wisdom tooth. It was a chunk of chicken bone. My brother thinks he’s getting his wisdom teeth when it turns out it’s not a tooth, but a rogue chicken bone.” – Crkhtir, Reddit.com
At Danville Family Dentistry we will be glad to give you something to make you smile. We also go to these great lengths to help you have a smile you can be proud of. Contact us today! 317-745-4400
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Disclaimer: The information included in this article is for educational purposes only. It should not be used as a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.
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